Community, Pt. 4: Friendship
Take Communion
Leader: Begin your gathering by taking communion together, whether as a full meal together or some version of the bread and the cup before or after dinner. If you don’t already have a Communion plan, have someone read these words from David in Psalm 133:
How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!
It is like precious oil poured on the head, running down on the beard,
running down on Aaron’s beard, down on the collar of his robe.
It is as if the dew of Hermon were falling on Mount Zion.
For there the Lord bestows his blessing, even life forevermore.
Review the Last Practice
During the last Community Guide, we talked about engaging and participating more intentionally in Bridgetown’s Sunday gathering. Before we talk about tonight’s Practice, let’s take a moment to talk about how this went.
How is your Practice of engaging and participating more intentionally in the Sunday gathering going? Any stories or updates?
Read This Overview Aloud Together
We are relational beings. Relationships form and shape us, they help define or reveal who we are, and they are core to what it means to be human. And, yet, not all relationships are the same — each necessarily holds different amounts of intention, depth, and commitment. We relate differently to our barista than to our kid’s teacher, to our boss than to our coworker, to our sister than to our husband. In the pages of Scriptures we learn that one of the most important types of relationships is friendship, the very relationship into which God is consistently inviting us all.
Whether we intend for them to or not, our friendships will inform who we are becoming. We become like those we spend time with. And if we’re wanting to be with Jesus, become like Jesus, and do what Jesus did, we must be intentional to have other people who want that too, and who will help you get there as you help them.
So tonight we will spend time doing two things. First, we will explore the friendships within our Community as we talk about our current rhythm of Family by planning our next Family night together. And, second, we will talk about taking time this week to intentionally celebrate and thank a friend in our lives or to intentionally take a step towards developing one.
Do This Practice Tonight
So far during this series, we’ve explored our Community’s rhythms of Discipleship and Mission, so up for tonight is our third rhythm: Family. By Family we mean cultivating a relational environment of trust, vulnerability, and safety by having fun together, celebrating together, and playing together.
Some of us tend to think that Community should be serious, that’s it’s somehow more “spiritual” that way. But seriousness is not a fruit of the Spirit, joy is. When a Family night comes up, we need to have a good time! Play and fun help us build a culture of vulnerability and safety that will facilitate deeper discipleship together. This Guide is really simple, but our goal is to plan a bigger-than-normal Family night together – to take our current rhythm of Family and turn it up – as a way of celebrating the friendship of our Community.
To begin our conversation, let’s discuss our Community’s current rhythm of Family.
How do we feel like our monthly rhythm of Family is going? What is going well and what could use some tinkering?
Leader: Pause for people to explore your Community’s current rhythm.
Whether or not we have a regular rhythm of Family – let’s take time to plan our next Family night together. As we go about this, let’s keep three values in mind: Fun, Celebration, & Gratitude.
Fun: Our Family night should involve something fun! Whether this is board games, ice cream sundaes, a group outing to the arcade, pumpkin carving, karaoke, a themed party, or something else, let’s do something out of the ordinary that feels playful and engaging.
Celebration: It could be really helpful during our Family time together to celebrate something. Whether something specific like a birthday or anniversary or something more general like a general sense of gratitude for each other, let’s shape our time together around celebrating something.
Gratitude: The best kind of gathering is one rooted in gratitude. Whether in a prayer at the beginning or end, or toasts around the table, or just in conversation throughout the night, let’s make sure to plan on reflecting about what and who we find ourselves grateful for.
With that all in mind, let’s plan our next Family night! As we do, while our goal is to plan one night, let’s be sure that someone is taking notes on all the ideas that come up because they can be used in future Family nights.
Leader: If your Community has a Family Night Coordinator, you may consider asking them to lead the following planning conversation – but make sure you aren’t springing it on them in the moment.
What should we do? What sounds fun? What do we have to celebrate? How can we express gratitude?
Leader: Take the time to plan out your next Family night as much as you can together, making sure that someone(s) has the task of running point.
Read The Practice for the Week Ahead
Before we leave, the Practice for the week ahead is to celebrate friendship!
Oftentimes we go through life forgetting the power of telling someone how much they mean to us. Take time this week to intentionally get together with a good friend with the purpose of letting them know what their friendship means to you and thanking them for being a good friend to you. Whether you buy them coffee or go on a walk or do something fun, be intentional with your words and bless them for the way they have supported and loved you well.
That said, some of us are still finding these kinds of friends. If that’s the case, think about who could become this kind of person in your life and invite them to hang out with you. Get together with them and be intentional to bless what you see in them. You don’t have to force something or decide then-and-there that you’re best friends; simply engage the slow work of building trust and vulnerability with another person who you think could bless you as equally as you could bless them.
End in Prayer
Leader: Close in prayer, asking God to help you to be good friends to the people around you.